You Make Unrealistic Demands Of Yourself And Wonder Why You’ve Always “Failed”
Most of the time, when we don’t understand how to use real self-control, we break ourselves off completely from something that’s eventually desirable or necessary. We fault ourselves for drinking when we know that not drinking doesn’t really bring us closer to being healthy or other objectives. We put tasks in every hour of the day and then wonder why we unavoidably fail at doing all of them. It’s about being stress-free on yourself and admitting the reality that making reasonable and smaller tasks truly gets them done and done fabulously.
You Identify with Your Feelings
…or your thoughts. Or the parts you play in other folk’s lives. You characterize with all these fleeting things and ignore who you really are. The person who is feeling all of them. If you categorize with your thoughts (“I am sad,” instead of “I am suffering sadness”) you begin to become them or think that feeling any one of them parallels to some very thoughtful and clear reality of who you are.
You Wait for Someone Else To “Save” You (Or Fix Situations In Your Life)
The way this usually manifest for most folks is just through constant complaining with no wish to change anything or agonizing loudly when the answer is easy. It’s the concept that if it’s not your fault, it’s not your issue. Even when you realize it is your problem.
Being your own best friend is about loving you enough to change your life. To be responsible for it, even if that’s difficult at times. As the great philosopher Oprah says: “If you are waiting for someone else to help you, fix you, even save you, you are destroying your time, because only you have the power to change your life.